install theme

cheatcommandos:

intosnarkness:

if you ever feel bad about yourself, just remember that one time i had to fly with my cello so we bought it a seat

and it got upgraded to first class

without me

i hate being that guy who adds onto a text post but my dad is a cellist and he has to buy a seat for his cello every time he has to fly somewhere for a show and the cello has become such a valued customer for airlines that we regularly get mail addressed to “Cello Friesen” for airfare deals and stuff

burgrs:

in 9th grade i was getting picked on in class and this girl was like “fuck you guys leave him alone” and called me over to her seat and I was like “thx lol” and she was like “I have something special to show you don’t tell the teacher” and I said “ok” and she pulled a guinea pig out of her purse 

phatamy:

urietarded:

textbooks attempting to be racially diverse will always be the funniest thing 

chow liung pao and shyniqua went to the supermarket